And then

This past weekend has been quite emotional for our family. A monster came. A monster with no thought and no conscience. A monster whose purpose it is to destroy.

This monster has visited our family before, but this time allowed us no time to say goodbye. What’s particularly awful about this particular beast is its ability to hide until it’s too late to do anything to stop what is coming.

The beast is cancer. It has ravaged the women in my life quite more than enough. I lost my grandmother, my great aunt, my mother’s twin, and now my sister-in-law. My mother fought the beast and won – twice! But in the end, her body was so weakened that she succumbed to a heart event and died alone, in the hospital during the awful lock down of 2020. I thought then, that depriving family members time with loved ones who are terminally ill and likely to die was beyond cruel. I still do.

But cancer is a cruel beast who cares not for age or sex or wealth or fame and it came and stole away a sweet and caring sister, mother, grandmother and friend.

And now we grieve, but the beast does not care. My heart is broken for my husband, his nieces and nephews and their families, and for myself because I have lost a fun-loving and compassionate friend.

God speed, Lin-lin – may you find peace and comfort in Heaven.

Outrage?

I was contemplating writing another what’s love got to do with it blurb, when I ran into a wall that changed my mind.

For anyone who doesn’t know, Texas experienced a major snow event recently. Now I am aware that there are parts of Texas where this is not exactly unusual, but I spoke with a friend living in the more southern climes in that big ol’ state and with temps dropping into low double digits (11 degrees F) she was experiencing some kind of winter weather shock, I can tell you.

Now while all of this may not be particularly interesting, what I found appalling was her statement that they would be experiencing rolling blackouts because, and I quote: “with these low temps more people are using their heat and the supply can’t keep up with demand”. WHAT?

We are in the year 2021 and the power grid cannot keep up with demand? What kind of insanity is this? I cannot fathom the staggering mismanagement and lack of foresight that would lead to something like this in the 21st century. I know a good part of their power supply comes from renewable sources, but what good is that when the system doesn’t work? I won’t pretend to understand the US power grid, and I have heard rumblings in the recent past that we are woefully unprepared for major changes, but what has been done to improve this situation? For my friends in Texas, it seems nothing.

So, I’ve broken out my crochet hook and all my blanket books and I’m getting busy. If it can happen in Texas, it can happen anywhere. More and more I’ve been thinking about the absolute “what if” situation and getting the emergency supplies ready. More and more I’ve found myself wondering what I would do in that ultimate emergency situation when you know there won’t be any help on the way. More and more, even at my age, I have to think about how I would survive on my own. It’s a sobering thought.

As I go back to my cup of coffee and my crochet project, I continue to think about my friend who is huddled in her living room and waiting for the heat to come on.

Am I doing this right?

Not having an understanding of how to blog, I am uncertain if writing each day is a thing. At any rate, just trying to check in and give my thoughts on another wet and wonderful Friday on the mid-Atlantic coast.

I suppose that writing daily is a good habit to cultivate and, eventually, I may even find that I have a talent for things like this. Not that I’m trying to write a best-seller, but I believe learning to write is a natural extension of being a bibliophile. To me, reading really is fundamental. I would cease to function if I were denied the written word. So, if there is anyone out there, these are just my thoughts. Thanks for reading along with me.

About love

It just dawned on me this morning that my devotionals and daily Bible verses are all about love and this month contains Valentine’s Day. Yes, I’m THAT slow!

Now, February 14th is most definitely a manufactured “holiday” designed to encourage people (who just spent a ton of money on loved ones at Christmas) to spend a ton of money on loved ones. I believe I’m going to try something a little different this Valentine’s Day.

I want to actively demonstrate love. I’ve begun to ask myself what that looks like.

For example: I’m a terrible listener. My first goal for one of the most important people in my life is to learn to listen to him. I mean, really listen! Not with the intent to respond, but with the intent to understand and empathize. So, really listening begins with me NOT talking. Now anyone who knows me, knows I want to be heard. I interrupt folks all the time. My side of the story is of the utmost importance and I will begin to state it even if it means speaking over someone else in the middle of their own story. I need to unlearn that type of behavior. Beginning now. I will make extra effort to listen to someone make an entire statement BEFORE speaking. I will try to process what I’ve heard BEFORE I say a word.

Lord, help me…I want to learn to love the way I’m supposed to love. I want to learn to love the way Jesus loves!